THE BOOK OF BUDDY: The Gospel in Doggerel
Kevin Scott
Fiction / Biblical
Word Count:
Brief Description
THE BOOK OF BUDDY: The Gospel in Doggerel was inspired by two facts: Nowhere in the gospels is it said that Jesus had a dog. Nowhere in the gospels is it said that He didn’t.
For the first time, THE BOOK OF BUDDY tells the story of Jesus in its entirety – including an unforgettable character the evangelists forgot, Jesus’s feistiest follower, Buddy.
Wacky enough for middle-schoolers and teens, it is witty enough for parents to read with them. And it’s touching and reverent too. (On the periphery of the story, Buddy’s adventures never infringe on sacred events..) When Jesus announces He’s leaving home, Mary worries He’ll be lonely. Jesus introduces a traveling companion.
At His feet, chewing His sandal,
Was a newfound little chum
Who was white and soft and furry
From his forehead to his bum.
Even Joseph had to smile.
(He was no pushover for pets.)
He knew, “A dog will keep you warm
At night, however cold it gets.
Mary was speechless. They grow up so fast.
They’re gone before you know it.
Buddy rested a paw on her forearm.
She was touched but wouldn’t show it.
I look forward to each chapter being illustrated.
Synopsis
The gospel story is familiar — overfamiliar — to far too many people. Especially young people whose attention spans have been sliced and diced by Instagram and TikTok. Unless jolted by something out of the ordinary, every thirty seconds, they can even lose interest in the greatest story ever told.
THE BOOK OF BUDDY: The Gospel in Doggerel is an antidote to all that distraction. It gives Jesus a four-legged sidekick — a “rescue” terrier — whose ignorance and warmth, loyalty and fear, will spark fresh interest – I hope — in familiar parables like The Prodigal Son and familiar scenes like The Agony in the Garden.
To my surprise, retelling this story, it’s been the things a dog doesn’t know that spark fresh insights in me and, I hope, in my readers, one day.
With no notion of what’s normal and what’s not, Buddy is baffled by all the excitement when Jesus cures a disabled man. Or walks on water.
With no understanding of death, Buddy’s unsurprised to see Jesus rise from His sleep in the tomb.
From the day in the temple when Jesus says goodbye to His parents, Buddy accompanies Him on His journey.
He plays Fetch with Peter as Jesus cooks kippers in a frying pan over a fire.
He gets wasted at a wedding reception when Jesus turns the water in every bowl and cup into wine.
He has the best meal of his life in a little inn, the night of Passover. Only to have Jesus wrested from Him.
[Buddy does not find his way to Calvary. So this Passion is cautiously “kid-friendly” about death.] This story ends with Buddy racing to rejoin the risen Jesus and leaping into His arms.
I hope that this playful retelling of the life of Jesus will pass on His message of love and peace at at a time when we sorely need to hear it.
Sample Chapters
HE BOOK OF BUDDY
The Gospel in Doggerel
Nowhere in the gospels is it said that Jesus had a dog.
Nowhere in the gospels it is said that He didn’t.
WHERE’S JESUS?
When Jesus Christ was twelve years-old
His family took a trip
To see Jerusalem. In the temple,
Jesus gave his folks the slip.
The caravan was halfway home
When Joseph glanced around:
“Hey. Has anyone seen Jesus?”
Back in the temple they found
Him preaching. You’d think
He’d been doing it for years.
“Jesus, You scared us half to death,”
His mother cried out through her tears.
“Oh Mom, I’m sorry,” Jesus told her.
“But you’ve got to understand:
The time has come to give Our Father
Who Art in Heaven a helping hand.”
“Not on a school night,” Mary bristled.
“You’ve got all those scrolls to study.”
Joseph warned Him, “You’ll get lonely.”
No, He wouldn’t. “Folks, meet Buddy.”
At His feet, chewing His sandal,
Was a newfound little chum
Who was soft and white and furry
From his forehead to his bum.
So even Joseph had to smile.
(He was no pushover for pets.)
He knew, “A dog will keep you warm
At night, however cold it gets.”
Mary was speechless. They grow up so fast.
They’re gone before you know it.
Buddy rested a paw on her forearm.
She was touched but wouldn’t show it.
Illustration idea. One of the camels (we can imagine Joseph and Mary riding home) pokes his head into the alcove where Jesus is mesmerizing the elders and now dumbfounding His parents.
Illustration idea. As Mary wags a finger at – and Joseph defends – Jesus for scaring them half to death, a little dog they’ve not met yet chews the sandal of their Son.
A DOZEN TO GO
Buddy got a little bigger.
Jesus grew Himself a beard.
They were hiking by the seaside
When a fishing boat appeared.
Buddy leapt up on the dock and wagged
His tail at the grizzled skipper
Dragging his fishing nets ashore.
The guy threw Buddy a tasty kipper
And then a stick for him to fetch.
The sun above, the sand beneath,
How could anything be better
Than a stick between your teeth?
As the crew fried up some dinner,
Jesus joined them to discuss
The kind of fishing He was doing.
“Fellas, you should come with us
And fish for souls to bring to God.”
The skipper laughed. “No, not this crew.
We ain’t cut out to be no preachers.
We ain’t teachers’ pets like You.”
“God isn’t grumpy,” Jesus told him.
“He’ll forgive your wicked words.
He likes superjocks and sailors,
Not just diplomats and nerds.
Let’s say, you raid your father’s wallet
And you run away from home,
Lose all his money at the racetrack,
You come back, he’ll say Shalom.”
Shalom means: I’m so glad to see you.
When you sin, you’re still His son.
Just repent. He can forgive even
The dumbest things you’ve done.
This sure was good news to the skipper.
He enlisted, there and then.
His nickname Peter meant: He’s tough
As rock, a Rocky among men.
The others followed his example,
Peter’s brother and ten more.
Buddy slept amidst a posse
Of apostles on the shore.
Illustration idea: Fishing boats in background, Peter throws a stick for Buddy to fetch.
Illustration idea: Buddy hungry beside Him, the apostles emptying their nets, Jesus cooks fish in a frying pan over an open fire.
PARTY ANIMAL
One fine day, as news that God is
Awfully fond of us was spreading,
Jesus and Buddy were delighted
To be invited to a wedding.
That is, till Mary saw the cater-
Waiters running out of wine:
“Son, the host, he needs Your help.”
Not yet quite ready to look divine,
Jesus drew back as Mary boasted
Of her Son, the Miracle-Worker.
But when she begged, “Jesus, for me?”
Well, no good Jewish boy could shirk her.
Jesus rose and told the waiters,
“Fill every cup and bowl with water.”
Then He proposed a toast to the father
Of the bride and his lovely daughter.
Taking a sip, the bridegroom’s father,
A real stuck-up fuddy-duddy,
Said “This wine must cost a fortune.
It’s so velvety and nutty.”
As the band played Hava Nagila
And the bride danced with the groom,
Buddy lapped up all the wine in his bowl
And reeled around the room.
He zigzagged through the twelve apostles
As they did the electric slide.
He taught the moonwalk to a rabbi,
Did a break dance for the bride
Until the four walls started moving,
And the floor. He felt so sick.
The wedding-planner rushed him out
Into the garden, double-quick,
Where he threw up among the onions.
Jesus got down on His knees.
“It’s okay, Buddy,” Jesus whispered
As He fanned away the fleas.
Illustration idea: Unsuspecting Buddy laps up wine from his bowl.
Illustration idea: Delighted guests watch Buddy, on his back, demonstrating a break dance.